Calling All Dads
As a mom, a Professional Mom, by the way, I don’t always understand the male point of view on some things. But I do understand that it is important, both to God and to the family.
God made man, then God made woman out of man, then He made the family. He never intended for women to raise the children by themselves. I do know some really strong ladies that have raised beautiful and productive children by themselves, however, the hole in that child’s heart that was not filled by a father will only heal with the love of our Heavenly Father. Fathers are important.
If you are blessed to have a loving wife and one or several children, I am so happy for you. You are one special person! As hard as it is to juggle all of the balls of life, i.e., work, work, work and home life, if you already take time to visit with your family at night or in the morning, take much needed vacations and help with school projects, you are a super dad and you can stop reading now. But if you come home after the children are asleep, leave before they get up and work all weekend, we need to talk.
There are many statistics and graphs on how much time we spend with our children daily, I like to think of “quality time.” For example, one of my favorite times with my family were our nightly dinners. This was a 2-year tradition when I lived in Florida from 12-14 years old. This was the only time in my life that I felt like we interacted as a family, and I got to know my father better than ever during those years. Usually, he was busy working and other places we lived, we didn’t sit around the table and eat as a family. Now, I loved my dad, but to say that we spent quality time together would be a stretch.
Please make time for your children. My brother used to read his baby, to toddler, to small child, daughter, the same book every night. That, I’m sure is a favorite memory for her. She is now a grown woman and though she lives away, when in town, she is his faithful sidekick. They nurtured a sweet relationship over the years. Your “tradition” may be different, but just a small amount of time, breakfast before school, supper time or bedtime, make the most special memories of time with Dad!
Here’s a conversation tip I learned as a trainer, Tell, Explain, Describe, yes, it spells TED. When conversing with your child, you usually say, “What did you do in school today?” And they say, “Nothing.” So now you can practice this great technique! You say, “Tell me what you did in art today?” (Or science, etc.) Or, Explain, or Describe. It is really hard for them to answer “nothing” with these specific questions. Practice this and it will transform your conversations!
In addition to making time to bond, please take your children to church. There is nothing that will make a difference in a child’s life more than worshipping and even serving with their dad. (Mom too!) It was Joshua who said, “Choose you this day whom you will serve…but as for me and my house, we will serve the Lord” Joshua 24:15. My favorite memories as a child were Vacation Bible Schools, which are now Bible Camps or Jesus Jam! If you can plan your vacation and volunteer, that’s all the better. Dad, you are the spiritual leader of your family and it’s time to step up!
So, these things I have mentioned that transform families, taking time, even a small amount, to communicate, making memories and traditions, and finally, taking your children to church, are up to you. Mom will fill in the gaps as she always does, but ultimately it is your responsibility to train your children in the Lord. You would not like to stand before the Lord one day and be embarrassed. “Did you raise your children in me?” “No, but my wife did!”
Calling all dads to step out and step up! Be the dad God wants you to be and your children will thank you with their love and respect!