Life gets busy y’all. I’m not kidding. I blinked my eyes and I am in my 60’s. How did that happen? I am grateful for my life, don’t get me wrong. God has blessed me with countless blessings. Unfortunately, one of those blessings was to eat anything I wanted, any time I wanted. Now, this was great during my years when I had hormones and metabolism, now, not so much.
Since my late 30’s, when I absolutely discovered the scale for the first time in my life, other than doctor visits when having the 6 children I already had at that time, it became my constant companion. And for many years, decades really, I have weighed myself consistently, as if as a daily devotional task.
Up and down, up and down, never really down as far as I wished, and many dollars and hours of wasted effort later, I kind of gave up. I say kind of, in that, I vowed (a teeny tiny vow that was to nobody in particular) to never spend another dollar on weight-loss products. The piece de resistance of my plight was the word OBESE on my doctor well visit reports that I kept getting for the last few years. Just knock me down why don’t ya?
When you talk about emotional rollercoasters, you need only look at me. Although my highs were higher than my lows were low, I still bought a Spanks something every time I shopped. I had up and down confidence issues about my weight both in my job and at home. I had read years ago that when you look good to you, that doesn’t mean you look the same to others. This caused me to second guess every outfit. My closet looked like a war zone and I ended up wearing the same thing for every occasion. Black was my favorite color. My prayer became, “Lord, I’ve tried everything, now it’s up to you…”